Conflict is all around us deal with it at the time and do not complain-Luciano The Key Santini

This is the way most people start out in life. People will always start out with goals but then they stop moving towards them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is a fine world for the person who knows precisely what he or she expects from life and is busy getting it.

We are happiest when we are striving to achieve a goal. When we achieve one goal, it’s a natural human tendency to set another, usually bigger, one. W. Clement Stone calls it inspirational dissatisfaction — the letdown one experiences after a goal has been achieved and before the next step toward a new one has been taken. When you begin to experience that nagging feeling, it’s time to get into action! Make sure you have a long-range plan in place so that when one short-term goal has been achieved, there is a natural progression toward the next. 

 

In business how many times have start up fail before their first customers comes into the door. I have seen many and why? It is simple really it is because there is no communication of services or products to the clients. Why do managers and CEO's fail with staff? Simple again because they may be great at creating policies and procedures but have no idea how to communicate the changes they aspire to take place.

 

What happens next can be worse because people who  do not have the skills become stressed out about any little thing or change that comes their way and thus will feel disconnected from their peers and customers and go into a down spiral and usually never recover from.

 

Conflict is all around us deal with it at the time and do not complain

 

How do you or how does anyone define workplace conflict?

 

We find ourselves at our jobs every day and spending more time there then we do at home. If you are one of the lucky ones you actually have a job that constantly challenges you as a person in your ares of expertise or mentally. There will be times of course when  you try to satisfy the needs of the company or the needs of your superiors there will always some type of conflict involved.

As a manager one is constantly dealing with spoiled children and most of the time it is more a behavior issue then anything else and you find yourself mediating all the time. So what is workplace conflict? Well it be defined as a difference of opinions that happens between management or directives that are not explained clearly. I have this article from a connection of a linked in friend which I find to be very interesting regarding conflict.

By Myron Curry
The workplace is your second home. In fact, some of you probably spend more time at work than you do at home. You are indeed fortunate if you have the opportunity to work in a job which you find challenging and interesting. But, however satisfying your job is, there always seem to be some type of conflict.
Workplace conflict happens regularly between team members, departments, managers, suppliers, vendors and sometimes customers. If you are a manager, then the problem of workplace conflict becomes a major issue as you are confronted with it on a regular basis. As one manager complained, it seemed like they were spending more time mediating between people who behaved like spoiled children rather than creative and productive individuals.

 In 1998, Professors Gilbert and Kreikebaum have the opinion that even if one party senses or anticipates a disagreement justifiably, conflict may said to exist. On the other hand, Donahue and Kolt (1992) says that conflict is “……..A situation in which independent people express (manifest or latent) differences in satisfying their individual needs and interests and they experience interference from each other in accomplishing these goals”. Can this universal definition of conflict be applied to workplace conflict as well?
The dynamics the workplace is somewhat unique which makes workplace conflict different. Before starting to tackle the issue of conflict in the workplace, you have to keep the following characteristics in mind:

• While some people work because they love the job and truly care, many other need stronger motivation to put in their full effort in the job.
• You do not get to choose your colleagues. Yet, you have to spend a lot of time with them, often in a high pressure situation. This is definitely a recipe for conflict.
• The work environment is a hierarchical structure and employees are interdependent with one another. So, perceived inefficiency on the part of one employee is going to affect the job quality of others.
• There are a number of dynamics operating in the workplace. Interdependence exists between colleagues, between the employee and the manager, the employee and the customer as well as the employee and outside suppliers. Whenever this delicate balance is upset, workplace conflict is the inevitable result.
• Increases in the volume of interactions accompanied by a lack of open and definite communication are another vital ingredient in workplace conflict.
• People with different personalities, cultures and styles must often work together in an interdependent way. Personality clashes as well as a clash of ideas consequently set the ground for workplace conflict.

The result of all the above factors can cause a disruption of work environments and the creation of the workplace conflict.
According to one study by Thomas and Schmidt in 1976, a typical manager spends almost 30% of their time resolving workplace conflict issues. This was followed by another similar study by Watson and Hoffman in 1996 which showed that this time workplace conflict has actually escalated to 42% of a mangers time in recent years.
The fact is that workplace conflict can arise from a series of reasons including differences in work-styles, background and gender, personalities, and skill level. When these types of conflicts go unresolved, they may turn into a much bigger problem down the road.

The ability to address workplace conflict in the early stages is an important component to resolving the issue. Unanswered or unmanaged conflict can escalate can disrupted an organization's growth as workers start spending more time entrenched in conflict than they do working on organizational goals.

WHY DO GREAT MANAGERS FAIL

WHY DO GREAT MANAGERS FAIL

There are so many managers that are and have been on the road to success list every year since the beginning of their career with organizations. They are moved into different roles, taking on different responsibilities and succeeding and getting great results each and every time.

 They are recognized as strong leaders because of their ability to get results create relationships both inside and outside the organization. The one thing that happens is that upper management begins for whatever reasons to either feel or see a threat coming their way and things begin to change. Suddenly everyone begins to ask questions such as:

What is going on? The truth of the matter is that sometimes upper management does not have the skills to manage knowledge and so become afraid of knowledge and of course you will have a clear example of the Peter Principle. Their teams begin to become contentious and morale begins to waver.

 I did a research paper on the Peter Principle in college and what most people do not understand is that this move can be used either to promote someone who has no skills for the promotion or to set someone up for failure who is a great leader but does not have familiarity with a new role thus trying to ruin someone’s career but of course they will be told that this is a great career move for them. 

This is the funniest and worst move when upper management does this to a person who understands both because it will back fire showing upper management’s incompetence to deal with the issues at hand.

What is the Peter Principle you might ask? Well here is the definition?

In an organizational structure, the assessment of the potential of an employee for a promotion  is often based on their performance in the current job ( Great at paperwork)but has no people or management skills or well liked because of special friendships or otherwise which results eventually in their being promoted to their highest level of competence and potentially then to a role in which they are not competent.

This will cause morale issues throughout the organization or department or will have someone else to do their work until either they leave or get demoted but in some cases like nonprofits keep them  because they are ready to retire and nothing can be done due to the structure in place and unions involved is referred to as their "level of incompetence".

 When a great leader is moved or promoted to a new role and has no familiarity nor the skills to deal with a bad situation that has been established either by another incompetent person The employee has no chance of further promotion, thus reaching their career's ceiling in an organization thus becoming black listed for a long time and thus upper management who moved this person into that role can now say that the issues at hand are what they are due to the incompetence of the manager they promoted when in fact it is upper managements incompetence.

 Does this mean that the person who is moved into a new role is no longer a great leader?

Doing a seminar on the Peter Principle

  Of course not!! They didn’t lose their ability to lead.  Their abilities and skills had not just simply vanished but other parts of the situation had changed which was to be moved to a role of no familiarity.

Now of course there ways and techniques to avoid these things from happening that either  the human resource manager if they are competent can do or upper management can do if they are competent and here are a few methods that organizations can use to mitigate the risk associated with the Peter Principle:

• Refrain from promoting workers based on their current performance without proof of their abilities to succeed in the desired role.
• Provide in-service training for the desired roles for those being considered for promotion or moved into unfamiliar ground.
• Provide a parallel career path for good technical staff, possibly with the offer of additional pay, perks or recognition without requiring promotion to management,

Here is a great article written by friend of a good friend of mine who is an excellent leader herself.  

By Edith Onderick-Harvey on March 5, 2015 

I’ve seen five common reasons why a leader who has been effective in the past is now failing.

1. Some critical skills were overlooked before. Let’s talk about the obvious reason first.  Some leaders have not developed key skills that they need to be successful.  Just like brilliant students who breeze through school, sometimes people climb to positions of leadership because they are brilliant marketers, brilliant scientists, or brilliant (put your profession here). But along the road to success, the people around this leader choose to overlook a key skill (or two or three) until it can’t be overlooked any more and causes huge issues.  For example, if we go back to Jessica, throughout her career it was noted in talent reviews that she could be abrasive and often got things done through force of will rather than by building relationships and coalitions.  She thought of herself as ‘results-focused.’  When she moved into her Operations role, it became imperative for her to build relationship with peers in other parts of the organization to get results.  Interestingly, her ‘results-focus’ is what got in the way.

2. Cultural mismatch. This is a common reason why leaders who have been wildly successful in one environment for a long time, fail miserably in a very short time in another.  The way a person operates and becomes successful in one culture can be very different from another.  For example, a leader may have been very successful in a culture that a valued quick decision making and risk taking.  Put that same leader in an environment driven by consensus and a desire to explore issues from every angle before moving forward and wait for the results.

3. Process and system mismatch. In the 1800’s, some people did very well in the wild, wild west and others went back home to the security of their established communities.  Some leaders are very adept at working in environments with less defined processes and systems.  They either work without them or really enjoy putting them in place.  Others thrive in environments where processes and systems are clearly defined.  Think of the serial entrepreneur who is put into a large, complex organization that has acquired his firm.  Change was a way of life in his entrepreneurial firm but isn’t in this large organization.  Leading change in the former was easy; everyone thrived on it.  In the new organization it takes real work. The processes that exist are meant to maintain the status quo not change it and people in his new organization wonder why he was once perceived as someone who drove change.

4. Lack of management support. Even the most seasoned executive needs people in her corner.  She needs people who support her success.  She may need coaching and mentoring to navigate the new role.  Even the best CEO won’t succeed if the Chairman of the Board decides she is not the person for the job and needs to go.

5. Organization structure. We all have been in situations where roles aren’t clear, responsibilities are redundant, unnecessary internal competition is the norm, resources aren’t available or decision making is lost in layers of management morass.  Leaders can find themselves in the same situations.  I worked for an organization once that routinely pitted leaders against each other by giving them the same issue to address or initiative to lead in different parts of the organization without each leader knowing about the other’s charge.  There could only be one winner in this situation so one of them automatically was going to fail.

As Victor Hugo said, “An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come.

Good morning everyone and thank you for reading my postings and thank you for your continued support on my life long journey to keep on trying to change the minds of people with a new perspective on where the world really is as opposed to what we wanted to be. Please understand that of course the world can be what we wanted to be in our minds simply because we have immediate control of that where we live and where we are employed.

If we do not like where we live then we can move and yes many will say;Well it is not that easy because we will need money and this and that to be able to move and though that might be true at that moment we still have the power to move immediately it is simply a choice. I did a little experiment on Friday evening at the mall.

The experiment went like this. I walked around the mall for a bout 30 minutes and watched people as I walked around and noticed that most people as they passed me by kept their heads down and wondered why. I smiled at everyone and I was dressed professionally so to me there was no reason for people not to say hello or something anything!

I then did the second part: I walked around the same area but this time I actually said hello to people and some responded and some did not they just looked at me a like I was crazy. I would laugh to myself because people are afraid of making any type of attempt to say hello. 

Control your own mind, and you may never be controlled by the mind of another.

The mind is the most powerful weapon known to man. It simply cannot be controlled or contained by an outside force, however formidable that force may at first appear. Throughout history, tyrants have tried to control those who opposed them, but eventually these rulers discovered the power of the imagination was far greater than the threat of the sword. As Victor Hugo said, “An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come.

How does this experiment fit into business

Well let us see and understand why this fits into any business. We all know that any business needs and thrives on customer service correct. I also realized and perhaps we all know this or perhaps we do not. People are paid when employed to do a or perform a job so when they get paid they do it and only when they get paid in most companies this is how it is done. The strange thing is that when you do such experiments you find who like to talk to people and those that do not unless they get something in return.

I find this a strange thing because you start to wonder about who you are as a person. Here is where you as an individual will start to question who you are as a man or a woman and this is where you will  realize what this world is like and the truth is that this world is so disconnected from human interaction that it is no wonder why we have the dysfunctions in organizations where no one want to work together.

I can tell from from experiments and research that you can teach anyone to talk to people if you pay them even if they are afraid to talk to people in general. People will talk if you pay them or reward them. I also find to be fascinating that people in general are good people the problem is that we have become disengaged thus the issues in organizations. I do these people experiments because it is a way to develop oneself it is a way to find out who you are as individual.

If you go to a restaurant where there is a children's playground and if you have children try this. Take your children and let them play for a few minutes and before you know they will start playing with other kids that they have never ever met. Why is that? I think the children have the answer to what most organizations have been searching for and have been paying millions of dollars to consultants to help them create teamwork and synergy among their employees. 

I always talk about changing the world and yet we still have such a long way to go but only because we as humans or grown up human beings have lost our childlike fun times. There are many books out there on this subject and yet we still do not get it. People are so disengaged in this world that we have wars all over simply because we do not talk,because we do say hello to one another.

Why is it when you go to see a move that is sad we cry? Really it is a movie we have no connection to the actors. Why is it when we hear a song that touches our hearts while we are driving we cry or smile and yet we have no connection the person singing the song? It is simple my humanoids. 

It is because whether we like it or not we are all connected and if we simply talked to each other we would find that perhaps we are different in one o\way or another perhaps we do not understand each other via language barrier but guess what our commonality is that we are human and we all have a mother and a father and someone loves us so why would we want to take that part away from each other? 

"Red Flags Everywhere And Knowledge Is Coming From Every Angle"

Good morning to all my friends who continue to stay with me on this long journey on changing the world one mind at a time by seeing the world for what it really is as opposed to what we see. This is a blog post on a more serious point today.

People always ask me regarding their present jobs and how they cannot stand their bosses or their environment and this is what i say to them each time.

My friends the job that you currently have will never be bigger then what you make it to be. I tell people how their imagination will always play a big part of the world in their minds and in their perspective. A man by the name of  Daniel Burnham, the turn-of-the-century architect and civic planner whose plan for the 1893 Chicago World’s Fair had an enormous influence on contemporary civic design, was quoted as saying, “Make no little plans.” He knew that to achieve great things we must have grand ideas. If you can imagine it, you can create it. And if you can create in your imagination the job that you would like to have, it is possible to create it in the real world. My journey has been created and now it is becoming a reality.

Inspiring Incarcerated Youth

Leaders ask me many questions as well one of which is: How do we manage people today with all this technology and currently I am working on a model that I call MI (Mental Investment Model ©)

 which will teach techniques not to manage people but to manage knowledge and behaviors at the same time and to learn to connect them meaning behaviors and knowledge with the right tasks making managing staff much easier. This takes time and the right personnel to teach these techniques to management. 

I promise there will be much resistance not only with staff but management because it is actually hard work, however once implemented it will make each manager wonder why this was not implemented a long time ago HAHAHAHAHAHA it had to be the right time and on top of that companies have to be prepared for this revolutionary change that will be taking place actually!! it has started already we just do not know how to manage it thus we do not see it or we just have ignored it.

Inspiring Teachers, Mothers and Fathers

 The world will need stronger mental attitudes meaning people will need to be stronger mentally and prepare for those who will be resisting change and then implement certain techniques so the change is smooth all the way to the top until implementation is accomplished.

I know there will be all the naysayers regrading my model and there will be those who will ask for proof and this and that and well honesty I will not care what they say only because I know human behavior and I have a clear understanding on business needs from start ups to large corporations. The most important thing that I know and understand is that I am a human being just like you and I know how to treat people just like me who is everyone around me and around you.

A bull may have good qualities, but you will never bring them out by waving a red flag in his face.

Arousing others is easy — if you don’t care what kind of action you inspire. If you wish to create a positive response in others, you do so by example and through the art of gentle persuasion, not by daring them to attack. When you work with others, concentrate on their positive attributes, not on the things they dislike or fear. When you take the time to get to know your associates, to learn about their hopes, dreams, and aspirations, you can determine what motivates them. You can then show them how they can align their goals with yours to work together for your mutual advantage. When you do, everybody wins.

Business And The Day of Love Much Money Will Be Spent Today

  

I was asked: Why was it that I never used big words in my writing? The answer was because I want people to know that I am real and to also be able to understand that I live in the real world. The question was great but the answer was better !!! 

Good morning or afternoon depending on where you may be when you read my blog. I believe you can be anywhere at anytime and take the time to sit down enjoy a hot cup of coffee or tea and enjoy a good read.

by Daniel Wesley

 

Tis year, Americans will spend an estimated $17.6 billion on Valentine’s Day—that is the second highest grossing holiday, coming second only to Christmas, and ahead of Mother’s Day, Halloween, and Easter. So just whose wallet is at the mercy of Cupid’s arrow, and what are they buying? Read on to find out.

You might be surprised to discover that while overall consumer spending is down, Valentine’s Day-related spending is on the rise. For example, in 2001, the average American spent $82.60 on the lover’s holiday. In 2008, at the start of the economic decline, the average spending was $122.98. This year, those celebrating will spend a whopping $126.03.

Today is  what everyone calls the day of love, but where did that come from. Today it should come from the heart. I was thinking about this late last night and well I began to think about my kids and I know it is about the significant other and well it should be but what about those that love you no matter what.

I believe that kids need to know just how much they are truly loved. I know we tell them every day but today they should also know how special they are.

Do not get me wrong I will tell my beautiful wife just how much she is loved because if I do not well I might end up on the couch tonight hahahahahahahahahah!!!

So where did this come from this Valentines day celebration?

Valentine’s Day: A Day of Romance 

By History.com

Lupercalia survived the initial rise of Christianity and but was outlawed—as it was deemed “un-Christian”–at the end of the 5th century, when Pope Gelasius declared February 14 St. Valentine’s Day. It was not until much later, however, that the day became definitively associated with love. During the Middle Ages, it was commonly believed in France and England that February 14 was the beginning of birds’ mating season, which added to the idea that the middle of Valentine’s Day should be a day for romance.

Valentine greetings were popular as far back as the Middle Ages, though written Valentine’s didn’t begin to appear until after 1400. The oldest known valentine still in existence today was a poem written in 1415 by Charles, Duke of Orleans, to his wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London following his capture at the Battle of Agincourt. (The greeting is now part of the manuscript collection of the British Library in London, England.) Several years later, it is believed that King Henry V hired a writer named John Lydgate to compose a valentine note to Catherine of Valois.

Typical Valentine’s Day Greetings

In addition to the United States, Valentine’s Day is celebrated in Canada, Mexico, the United Kingdom, France and Australia. In Great Britain, Valentine’s Day began to be popularly celebrated around the 17th century. By the middle of the 18th, it was common for friends and lovers of all social classes to exchange small tokens of affection or handwritten notes, and by 1900 printed cards began to replace written letters due to improvements in printing technology. Ready-made cards were an easy way for people to express their emotions in a time when direct expression of one’s feelings was discouraged. Cheaper postage rates also contributed to an increase in the popularity of sending Valentine’s Day greetings.

Americans probably began exchanging hand-made valentines in the early 1700s. In the 1840s, Esther A. Howland began selling the first mass-produced valentines in America. Howland, known as the “Mother of the Valentine,” made elaborate creations with real lace, ribbons and colorful pictures known as “scrap.” Today, according to the Greeting Card Association, an estimated 1 billion Valentine’s Day cards are sent each year, making Valentine’s Day the second largest card-sending holiday of the year. (An estimated 2.6 billion cards are sent for Christmas.) Women purchase approximately 85 percent of all valentines.

Now that we have that out of the way let continue to business and the psychology of leadership in today's world. I find that when I go into any organization large or small I have the same questions asked or I should say most of the time the same questions come up but one in particular.

HOW DO YOU GET PEOPLE TO DO WHAT YOU NEED THEM TO DO?

I have to tell you that my answer is always the same. "Treat people like adults and not children"  The other thing is that most companies treat people like if they were in the turn of the century and well that has hanged and one must not manage people anymore but manage their personalities and psyches. 

How many of you remember the old commercials that stated that the mind was a terrible thing to loose and then showed the egg on the frying pan and granted it was regarding drugs but in the real world in business how many time do we hire competent individuals who would be great leaders if we the owners or managers allow them to grow and become leaders.

We must allow staff to make suggestions and we must be open minded to the changes that come along with managing people.

You will encounter many different types of people during your management career.  If you are managing a group of around 20 or less, you really should be able to get a feel for each individual’s personality.  Even if you manage a group of 100, you should still be able to know the key players personalities.  It helps when you know what makes each one of them tick, especially when communicating one-on-one.  When dealing with different personalities, be tolerant of styles different from your own.  Always try to adapt to their personality to get your point across, or to get more out of them. 

You can’t use a cookie cutter approach with every employee.  In most cases, you will need to change your communication approach with each individual.  For example, you will not get your point across if you're too direct and data oriented with a touchy-feely kind of person.  In the same token, you would not want to be too touchy-feely with a no-nonsense type of person.  This is also important when delegating any projects to individuals or as small teams.  If a person or team is too analytical, there will be little creativity.  If a person or team is too sensitive, fewer decisions will be confidently made. 

Friendly cooperation will get you far more than unfriendly agitation in any market.
When you treat your competitors with the courtesy and respect you would like, most will respond in kind, and the result is a stable, productive, profitable industry. On the other hand, an industry or market that is composed of vicious, unethical competitors will soon destroy itself. When you are asked how your products and services compare with those of your competitors, speak respectfully and politely about your rivals, but use the question to shift the discussion to your company and your products. Acknowledge others’ good points, and then move on. If you complain too much about the competition, prospective customers may wonder what they are missing and refuse to buy until they have compared your products and services with those of others. 

If you wish “acquaintanceship,” be rich. If you wish friends, be a friend.

There is nothing like money to make you attractive and appealing to others. But, of course, the kind of people who are attracted to you only because of what you can do for them may be acquaintances, not friends. You may have many acquaintances if you become wealthy, but whatever your station in life may be, you will never have true friends unless you are a friend to others. Be very selective in your choice of friends. Choose to associate with positive people who like you for the person you are, who encourage you to be yourself and to be the best you can be. 

I always find Napoleon Hill to be one of my most inspirational mentors. He says what needs to be said in a brash kind of way but also in a way to understand the reality of life and not just in theory.