Hello everybody and thank you for joining me here today on this most beautiful day. Today I want to discuss the concept of what it means to truly focus.
Let me start by saying that we all have focus even if and most especially when we are under pressure and our lives seem chaotic. You know - those days when it seems like one is lagging behind and we just can't seem to catch up and we get feelings of great anxiety as if one is about to experience a nervous breakdown? I think we've all experienced those days. Men and women experience these days as do young adults and yes even children. Those are the days when "focus" becomes a great asset to us all.
But it's built in. It's built in to our natural way of dealing with every day events in our lives - one might call it instinct. Some of us might not be aware but when we are trying so hard to accomplish one thing or another and everything seems to keep falling down around you - that is when a person is really focused - when it seems like no matter how hard you try - things just keep coming back to the same feeling of helplessness and failure. But I want assure you that this is simply not the case. It is in these times when one seems destined to fail that we are actually at our best. Because we are trying so hard - so, so hard to get to where we want to be and all of these obstacles keep popping up and yes these types of situations can be difficult - but guess what? It's difficult to run the mile a minute faster than yesterday or score more touch downs on Sunday at the park than you normally do. And yet playing at the park or keeping healthy is something that does not seem to stress us out. Why? Because there is no sense of urgency - unless,...unless we put it there ourselves. It works exactly the same way with any other situations - be it marriage, job, family etc. Just do what you are happy to do in the first place and everything else will just fall into place naturally. So if one understands this one also understands that so long as you don't " give up " you are focused and should remain so until your goals are met; don't let negativity inhibit your success.
Ask yourself - am I putting these extra feelings of insecurity and distress there myself? Am I running late today because I didn't get up when the alarm sounded? Is my child asking for things or time that I don't feel I have at the moment because I feel like I'm too busy? Is my wife or husband angry with me today because I was short with them this morning because I was running late? Did I miss putting out the trash this morning because I didn't get up in time? Did I put these feelings of anxiety and distress in my mind myself? You will find that the answer to all of these questions will undoubtedly be yes.
Yes, we tend to be our own worst critic.
The truth of the matter is that we create our own obstacles. For example: Say I want to lose 20 pounds; I go on a diet for a whole month and I only lose 2 pounds and so I feel like I have failed. In fact I have not failed at all. I've started to lose the weight but what I did fail to do was set a realistic goal - not because a person can't lose 20 pounds but because my goal may not have been realistic - or maybe I didn't account for external factors such as time - my own rate of metabolism or how other things just seem to have gotten in my way. So it takes you 10 months to lose 20 pounds - so what? Take your time, enjoy what you are doing and in 10 months you will see the results that you were looking for. Do it for yourself - not because you can't be happy if you don't lost 20 pounds in 1 month - it may as well be 5 minutes. That is definitely unrealistic right?
Think about the statement: In my way. That is a funny statement is it not? What is in my way? Well lets see,...nothing. Nothing, unless I put it there. Sure a roadblock might make me drive to the next street, but I do know how to get to the next street right? So it isn't really a roadblock is it? It's just a new route. And that is how we should deal with any obstacle that may be blocking our path to attaining our goals. Simply create those new routes. That's what we do naturally every time havoc comes into our lives. We naturally and instinctively create new routes.
In the middle of a hectic situation one realizes that they are light headed because they haven't had lunch and it's close to 3:00 and your stomach is growling and your stress jumps even more now because you know you have to stop to eat and you have somewhere you have to be at 3:30 and you make a stop so that you can eat something. So it seems like you are failing or will fail in the end. That feeling - as though you are failing or that you will fail in the end is the only obstacle in your path and guess what? You put it there. True we can't change what happens in the world, but we can most certainly limit how it affects our minds, our feelings and definitely our determination.
We put things in our own way all the time - we create obstacles which make normality seem like chaos in our own minds. We inhibit what all of us already do in a natural and instinctual way.
Focus. Don't think that because things are tough or you seem to be falling behind that you are failing. Because in fact, you are at your best. And you are very, very focused. Just stay on track and drop the feelings of negativity - because that is the only thing in between you and your happiness and thus the only making you feel like a failure. As long as we don't give in and give up to any obstacle - be they in our minds or in our world, we cannot fail. Just focus!
Thank you for stopping by and have a very nice day.
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